The Night of the Poop Massacre!!

I have been thinking about telling this story in October, but I just couldn't hold it in any longer!

It was a dark, October night at our church building in St. George, where I was in charge of our troop's pack meeting, being held there in the primary room. I had put so much effort into this year's Halloween meeting, trying to out do the year before. I had everyone dressed up in costumes, including myself, as a clown. The party was going smoothly, I loved being Cubmaster, we had a lot of boys there, includeing some of their friends and their families. Jason was working and unable to help me, I had arrived hours early to deorate and I wanted this to be a night they would never forget. I always included all of my kids, and the boy's siblings too, in the activities. I was pretty busy, and by the end of the evening, I was exhausted, hot, sweaty, and ready to go home. I had to clean up everything, and all my leaders took off as quickly as they came. So I had my neice Dria and my four kids, doing the finishing touch-ups. I hated being in the church alone, but there was guy in another ward working in the gym for thier upcoming activity. When I had finished putting everything in the van, I noticed that one of my kids were missing...

So I went looking for him, in my clown suit, at this point, I had only taken off my nose, and I was upset and tired of chasing the kids around the building trying to get them in the car. When all of the sudden, as I walked towards the bathroom area, I noticed, someone had taken brown pudding with their hands, and made like a claw mark with it, across the carpet portion of the wall, leading towards the men's restroom. I thought, oh great, I guess I have to clean that up, we did, after all have worm n' dirt pudding cups. But as I opened the maintance closet door, next to the men's door, I noticed a terrible smell.... I looked at the door, it had brown stuff on it too, where the handle was. I went closer to the door and heard the sobbing of the lost child, that I was looking for. So I grabbed the edge of the door, and called out for him. Knowing that no one else was around, to the horror did I discover when I opened the door! When I saw it, I screamed! Dria and the rest of my kids came running, and even the guy in the gym... In which, I saw his face, and I never saw it again! He took off, and left the building!!!!

My child had locked himself, in one of the three stalls, in which he had locked all three to make it fun. I couldn't even walk to him, I couldn't even walk inside, because there was poop all over the floor, on the doors, on the counter, in the sinks, on the faucets, on the walls, on the bapitizm bench, and even the mirror! He put poop on everything, except for the ceiling! (he couldn't reach it I guess!) I gagged and gagged and closed the door, I had to get the mop out first, so I could clear a path inside. As I was preparing, I put my clown nose back on, I couldn't take off my clown suit because I was just wearing garments underneath. While this was going on, Dria had took it upon herself to call my parent's who lived near by, by using the church phone. Here is how it went...

Dria: "Nana, Nana! Come quick! It's all over , all over the place! We need your help! Bring towels!"
My mom: "What? Blood? It's all over? Who?"
Dria: "Hurry, hurry! Just come now! "

Then I noticed she was on the phone and I told her to hang up, because this was too embaressing and I would never hear the end of it! So by the time I made my way to the stall, I thought about being mad, but I just asked, why? He cried and cried, and said it was because he couldn't get his costume off and he had to go diarrea, and nobody would help him...So in other words, it's all my fault, I was too busy, and I let him pick out a costume that was a one peice!

My parent's arrived, just as I got my son to open the door, and I saw, it was even worse, inside and on him. I can't remember what my parent's said when they saw what had happened, I am sure my dad said, "What the he**?" He was nicer after that, he actually stuck around because they felt sorry for me, and knew I was at my wit's end. They were afriad that someone had gotten hurt and there was blood all over the place, not poop! My kids were running in the dark hallways, and I could hardly talk to my mom, because I was gagging, trying not to barf.

How did I get through this you wonder? Well, my dad had a idea, that they would clean up the kid, while I cleaned the room and hallway. My mom took off his Ninja costume in the bathroom, it was like unpeeling two peanutbutter filled sliced breads apart. Then they put him in the maintance closet spray area, and hosed him off! I got dish soap from the kicthen and then they wrapped him up with a garage bag to wear home... I cleaned everything at least twice, but the smell still lingered, even after I sprayed disinfectent everywear.

As usual, I hope by telling this story, so others may learn by my mistakes, and as a how to, and what to do if, kind of lesson. You may be able to guess what child this was, but please never mention it to him or in front of him, I am afraid it may have scarred him for life. I love this child, and normally this sort of thing doesn't happen in our household. Let's just say, since then, I would never buy a one peice costume that is hard to get off, or wear a clown costume again but I couldn't ever have done it without the help of my parent's and a clown nose!